


An Awkward Party

by BakerStTardis (Sokashi)



Series: Hobbit Advent [3]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-08
Updated: 2013-12-08
Packaged: 2018-01-03 23:54:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1074538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sokashi/pseuds/BakerStTardis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Day Three Hobbit Advent. Prompt mulled wine.</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Awkward Party

"I can choose my own drink-" bilbo grunted under the force of the mug Thorin shoved at him, the familiar scent of ale overpowering the smells of the fine foods laid out before them. The hobbit glared and the dwarf ignored it. Which really shouldn't have surprised Bilbo at all since there was a whole hall filled with elves for Thorin to stare suspiciously at instead.

Erebor's Grand Hall had been decorated for Yule. Delicately woven snowflakes dotted pillars, jeweled statues of dwarvish folklore had been repaired and stood throughout the room. Bilbo had even managed to get some hobbit inspired wreaths and colorful streamers into it as well. The food laid out among the tables was all the best. A nice variety for elves, dwarves, and a single hungry hobbit. Even Bilbo had been decorated. His best suit had been deemed unworthy of a Friend to the King-Under-The-Mountain or a hobbit called Elf-friend by Elrond (and less willingly by Thranduril himself). Instead Bilbo had been given the softest velvet pants he'd ever seen and a fine silk shirt in brilliant white by the elves while the dwarves had (rather forcefully) bestowed him with a jeweled vest in gold cloth topped with a fancy coat of heavy blue material Bilbo was suspicious had come from Thorin's wardrobe originally. It was a possessive move for the dwarf, but not the worst way he could show it so Bilbo bit his tongue and wore it. Besides, he knew when he looked good.

Still, for as nice as the Grand Hall and all its occupants looked- it was stiff and awkward inside. Elves and dwarves stood on opposite sides of the room. Everyone had a drink, but that seemed about as far as anything had progressed. It was utterly silent. Bilbo shifted, frowning at both sides of the room before taking a sip of his ale. The movement seemed to draw everyone's eye and Bilbo sighed mentally, resigned to playing host for half of middle earth. He smiled cheerfully and cast around quickly for a topic.

"So." His voice carried easily through the hall. "Elves prefer mulled wine." He nodded slightly to himself as he looked around, trying to spot someone to help him. "Dwarves prefer ale. Obviously." Crickets. There were literally crickets chirping in some lone corner of the room. The echo of it was both haunting and humiliating. "Frankly I prefer hard cider if anyone's asking. We make an excellent one in Hobbiton. At the Green Dragon-" he winced mentally. Sure. Bring up dragons, Bilbo. That's not a sore spot for anyone. Pretending obliviousness, Bilbo continued chattering on. " If any of you ever visit the Shire you should stop by."

The tense silence had transferred to awkward under his prattling. Thorin was staring at him as if he'd gone insane and Thranduil- well, the elf king wasn't big on facial expressions but Bilbo would call this one Confused Curiosity. As if he couldn't fathom what Bilbo was nor why he was being allowed to speak. Bilbo scowled at all of them equally. "Look. We hobbits are excellent conversationalists. I can't help it if you only brought one of us!" He snapped.

The elven king's eyes widened slightly and somewhere behind him someone moved to whisper to his neighbor. That was all that was needed, apparently, because then the room was filled with low voices. The dwarves and elves were only talking to each other, but it had to be better than the uncomfortable mutual staring. 

Bilbo sighed, closing his eyes briefly before taking a sip of his ale. He felt more than saw Fili and Kili step up on either side of him. "Wow, Bilbo." Fili said, his tone incredulous.

"Yes, well done." Kili snipped sarcastically.

Bilbo sputtered and glared. "This was your idea!" He hissed. "It should be the two of you out there trying to start conversations!"

Both young dwarves lifted their chins in haughty expressions rather too reminiscent of their uncle. "Well who could say anything with you rattling on?" Kili asked. They started to move away but Bilbo quickly set down his mug to snatch at two princely collars. Fili grunted in surprise and Kili squeaked when Bilbo tugged them down to eye level. 

"I will strangle you both." Bilbo warned, fuming, and not the least bit amused. The young Durins looked all at once young and a little chastised though not quite willing to apologize. "Now get out there and mingle! Remember what I told you earlier! You're hosts! Act like it even if your stone-skulled uncle won't!" He let go of their collars just as quickly, shoving them slightly so that they straightened and didn't quite stumble.

The two brothers glanced at each other and looked uncertain. Kili tugged at his jacket, cheeks slightly flushed. "We don't know what to say." He admitted quickly, voice low.

Beside him Fili looked uncomfortable. "This seemed a lot easier when we were imagining it."

Bilbo closed his eyes briefly and sent a prayer for help to anyone who would listen before opening them again. "Look-" he said more gently. "You're both sweet and charming. Just be yourselves. Pretend you've never met any of them before. Pretend their not even elves if you have to! Just go talk to them!"

They both frowned and shared a look. "Will you come with us?" Fili asked. The words were quick and questioning as if that could take any of the vulnerability out of them.

"No I will not." Bilbo announced. "I'm going to finish my ale and maybe have another one. Now go." The brothers shared another look, one Bilbo didn't trust, but frankly he didn't care at the moment. He'd already made a fool of himself once. It was someone else's turn next.

The low chattering had lost some of its tenseness as Bilbo swallowed the rest of his ale before moving to investigate the closest table of food. He was intercepted before he could make it, a glass of mulled wine placed in his hand by an elf with rather alarmingly blue eyes who smiled only a touch stiffly at him. "You're brave, master hobbit."

Bilbo tried not to scowl. "It's not bravery to be polite. Something both your races could learn about." The words snapped out of him before he could stop them and Bilbo slapped a hand over his mouth, looking up at the elf in horror. "Oh, I'm sorry. That was uncalled for-"

The elf looked surprised but a little amused. "Think nothing of it." He said thoughtfully. "Some truths are harsh." He took a step back and bowed slightly. "And I think I should do my part in this as well." He looked uncomfortable and stiff, but when he moved away Bilbo saw he moved towards Fili and Kili who were at least making an effort to breach the space between the elves and dwarves.

"Where's Gandalf when you need him?" Bilbo asked no one and quickly drained his glass of mulled wine so he could have his hands free for food.

 

Things progressed quickly after that. Bofur found him and gave him another ale, cheered him up with some rather off-colored jokes of the kind dwarves always appreciated (although the closest elves smirked a time or two. Bilbo pretended not to notice) Then there was some more wine and some outrageous stories. Elves lived long lived and seemed to like their tall tales as much as anyone else Bilbo had ever met. His hand itched for quill and paper, but he thought it rude to ask to write another's stories. (At least at first telling.) jokes and stories, food and drink. The spices of the wine mixed... Interestingly with the body of the ale. Then some brilliant mind thought of music and the hall was filled with instruments and voices and the longer it went on the more there and stomping and clapping joined in- no dancing, at least not that Bilbo saw, but there was time for that later, of course.

Bilbo got Thranduil to sit on a bench, though, and one near where Thorin was standing. Where Thorin was actually laughing at something someone said. The two kings eyed each other but didnt argue or threaten or- preen- which was progress. Very good progress in Bilbo's book. Bilbo who might've been a touch drunk because he thought it was a good idea- he was determined- to get them to actually talk to each other. Not about Erebor or Mirkwood or Dale, even. Certainly not treasure, but about- about- cider. Cider was good. Cider was safe. Why wasn't there any cider? Don't dwarves and elves drink it?

A rather amused looking Thranduil admitted that honestly an elf would drink almost anything and he cast an eye on Thorin who grunted that a dwarf definitely would. And likely some things that they shouldn't. And, the two kings didnt laugh or even smile but it was good! It was progress! And Bilbo smiled enough for both of them.

Things got louder after that and someone brought Bilbo cider and Thorin scowled when Bilbo kissed them in thanks and Thranduil laughed which surprised Bilbo so much he dropped his mug. He hadnt expected to hear that and then- and then-

And then Bilbo couldn't recall much.

Except a bit of a dizzy head.

And Thorin holding him up surprisingly gently at his side when Bilbo would have wavered on his feet. (Lies. He'd be flat on his face. But preferably not in front of the elves.)

Thranduil. Thranduil, though, stood looking down on all of them. Hauntingly, scarily beautiful. Like an ice sculpture brought to life. He'd stared for a long moment and Thorin had stiffened, staring right back in that bull headed way he had and Bilbo wanted to tell them both to quit being so stubbornly arrogant- Thorin jostled Bilbo slightly.

"You're thinking out loud, Bilbo. Just shut up a bit."

Thranduil looked amused. "Thank you for inviting us." He said regally. Thorin twitched in response, didn't quite nod. "And keep the hobbit." The elven king added before he turned to leave.

Bilbo snorted at the implication but Thorin's over large hand covered whatever he might've said. "We plan to." Thorin replied.


End file.
